Are You on a Train, or Have You Been Eaten by a Giant Worm?

Imagine yourself in the following scenario: You were taking your usual commute to work, but you’ve forgotten the specifics of where you are. You know you’re inside a large, mobile, vaguely cylindrical object. There are a few other people sitting around you. Every few minutes, the object will stop moving and other people will walk in or out.

You are either riding a train, or are inside the digestive system of a train-sized worm.

If this scenario sounds familiar to you, keep reading! Here are a few questions you can ask yourself to get your bearings and determine whether or not you’ve been eaten by a giant worm.

1. What are your surroundings made out of?

Building materials are the primary difference between trains and giant worms. Trains are primarily built out of man-made materials such as steel and glass, whereas worms are exclusively made out of worm. Examine the walls. Do they consist more of manufactured parts or worm parts?

2. How concerned do other people look?

Being digested by a man-eating worm is a traumatic experience for most. Look around. Do the people near you seem frightened, upset, or generally disappointed by their situation?

Keep in mind, however, that everyone processes trauma differently. If no one else looks as concerned as you are, it’s possible they’re just putting on a brave face.

In fact, it’s likely they’re just putting on a brave face.

3. Has the unknown object gone underground?

Worms are typically known for two things.

1: Eating people when they reach a large enough size.

2: Burrowing underground.

Now, this isn’t to suggest that trains can’t go underground—there are plenty of trains that can move through tunnels—but worms are famous for the practice.

Just take that into consideration.

4. Are train station stops being announced at regular intervals?

It sounds obvious when pointed out, but so many people forget this simple fact: Trains can’t talk! They’re inanimate vehicles that have no business knowing the station they’re approaching! How could a lifeless train be telling you things?

If you hear stops being announced, that’s a clear sign that the giant worm is messing with you.

5. What are your surroundings made out of?

You may have asked yourself this question earlier in the list, but it’s worth re-examining now. The walls look more like worm skin the more you examine them, don’t they? Why do those “chairs” everyone is sitting on resemble the inner workings of a giant worm’s intestine so closely? If this so-called “train” is made out of man-made materials, how is it moving along a track like a worm?

The pieces are all falling into place now, aren’t they?

6. Is the giant worm leaving a slime trail?

Don’t be fooled. That’s not a “railway”. Those aren’t “train tracks”. That’s a slime trail.

You’ve been eaten by a giant worm.

If you were able to answer all of these questions, you should have a clearer picture of where you are now. If you’re wondering what to do about your situation, check out my other post, “Tips for Defeating a Giant Worm From Within” (publish date to be determined).

Until then, sit tight!

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